What......What......I can't understand you! That has been said to me more times than I can count. You see, my disease causes my muscles to tighten, and your larynx is a muscle. So, with that comes a very strangled sounding voice named , Spasmodic Dysphonia. Most days it makes communication virtually impossible. But there is a bright-spot to this story and it is named, Botox. No, I'm not talking about putting it into my face so that I look gorgeous and wrinkle free. (Although that does sound interesting!) It is injected directly into my larynx to stop the muscle contractions. So my face may be wrinkled as a prune, but my larynx is smooth as a baby's bottom.
So Botox helped me get my voice back, but I believe I was helped in a greater way. Through the struggle of no voice I began to see my disease in a different light. I have always been a talker. I just plain love to talk! I am a retired teacher, and I loved standing at the front of the room , like a great Shakespearian actor, instructing my students. Being cast into a world where I couldn't communicate was easily the hardest thing I have gone through. I then began to look at my life, and I saw that not being able to walk without adaptive equipment wasn't so bad. Don't get me wrong, I would love to be able to walk without problems, but talking is so much more important to me.
Now I get a shot around every three months. There are a few side effects that come with the shot, but they are so worth it. After a few weeks of a breathy, Minnie Mouse voice, I am able to speak in a near normal voice. I will never sound exactly like my old self, but I am able to say important words to my family, and the most important being, I love you.
Have you ever thought about your disease in a different light.